♫ Xin ❤
~Xin Xin World~
  


♥☆ Sunday, July 26, 2009 ; 1:08 AM ☆♥
❥{haiz...just feeling moody...

Haiz...haiz....haiz...X100

Have to admit i am still feeling angry and moody...i think going to split personality liao...sometime angry...sometime a bit angry...i guess...side-effect bah...lols =.=""

Also have to admit...still angry with L bah...not with the past thing...not anymore...but just feel...i dunnoe...i mean...dunnoe why...just feeling frustrated bah...i just dun seem to know what he is thinking anymore...i mean as a friend...and i dunnoe why...he dun seem to understand what i am saying anymore...so frustrating...in the past...at least when we say a few words we can understand what each other are saying or thinking...but now...i just dunnoe...and i dunnoe is it from his heart or is he just say say only and dun meant it...i really dunnoe...everytime when manage to talk to him...or when he suddenly feel like talking...i have to really guess what he is thinking...but i no longer able to tell...moody...

Really emo...and he just dun understand...even if i say it already...he just...dun understand...haiz...and i wonder...am i even being treated as a friend to him? Which catergory?...haiz...and he just like to assume things...dun wanna ask me...or explain...just like to assume...and i even have to guess what he is assuming...haiz...but i do really treat him as my friend...as my close friend...but...haiz...even if i treat him as close friend...i think he still wanna assume otherwise bah...

Dunnoe what he wanna assume...haiz...and everytime i am the one asking and approaching for everything...worried and concerned for him as though he is my brother...always am the one worrying dumbly..."dunnoe how is bro L doing...how come so emo..."...but never had he asked me...or even let me feel a very tiny bit of concern as a friend...even for all my other friends...old friends...new friends...good friends...best friends...close friends...we still keep in contact now and then...chit chat a bit now and then...giving concern for each other...asking how each other is...but bro L is just...silent...i mean...there can be no contact for several weeks...days...haiz...X100...i just feel like a spare _____...

And getting moodier...really super moody...dunnoe how to vent it out...i guess...just have to swallow it...and let it stay inside bah...at least...yar lor...

With WWIII going on and off...and with a lot of things having to settle...and...i really dunnoe...haiz...

Just trying to pray hard...to keep a clear mind...and try to keep myself from thinking too much...or get moody or angry too much...but i guess a bit hard bah...haiz...

And with club event coming up soon...and a lot of jobs and works to be done...feeling a bit exhausted...i guess those past few days of fun and happy time are just temporary...haiz...but i do enjoy doing all the works...jobs...activities...at least...i can experience more things...and learn more things... =)

Have to prepare for my slides...which i completely have no idea where to start...have to prepare for picture slides...which i completely have no idea in also...and need to prepare for the speech...which i also dunnoe how to prepare...i guess just have to talk to the mirror bah...>.<

Sometime just really wanna talk it out...all the moodiness...exhaustion...but i guess...i just have to swallow it bah...treat it as food bah...lols...

Gosh...how come my posts these few days so emo de...*banging head*... >.<
Xin ♡