♫ Xin ❤
~Xin Xin World~
  


♥☆ Saturday, February 26, 2011 ; 2:04 PM ☆♥
❥{ahhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!! stress ahhhhhhhhhh!!!!

Haiz...the stress are piling up each day with new things coming in every now and then...

Oh my first round of eye test seem to be relatively okie except with thinner eye membrane and also need another round of testing on my nerve connecting my eye to my brain at the eye centre at around April...so will be another round of testing and blurring of vision >.<

Now reading up my notes...and i dun seem to be able to understand anything eventhough i seem to have done it like...last year I think...

But i dun seem to remember anything...=(

Now my friend is working beside me...but then he seem to be irritating me...or am i getting very frustrated that i lose my temper easily? This is soooooo frustrating =( =(

Haiz...just hope that at least i can survive this sem peacefully...trying to push down my frustration and anger (angry with myself for not being able to understand anything)...haiz =(

Oh well...but a happy thing is i got another chocolate gift from my friend Ben...really cute and seems really delicious...yummmm~

Have to jiayou jiayou jiayou!!!!
Xin ♡




♥☆ Saturday, February 19, 2011 ; 2:27 PM ☆♥
❥{will i be able to see?

Has been a long time since i updated...

Has gone through quite a few episodes these few weeks...

But the recent one really affected me deeply...

It concerned whether i will be able to go on in future...
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Since young...has been having great difficulties seeing at night...but i thought that it is normal (even with dim light)...or maybe my eyesights are just weak...

However...last week...all of a sudden during my dinner...i start to see black spot which lasted for half an hour to an hour...its like...a dark spot rite in front of me...both my left and right eyes can see it...i tried closing my eyes but the spot are still there...tried rubbing my eyes or washing my eyes or closing my eyes but it doesn't help...this is when i really start to fear a lot a lot...

Went to see doctor at polyclinic at je on thursday...wanted to get a referral letter to see a specialist...kinda asked the doctor what is happening to my eyes...he is also unsure...so asked him will there be a chances of me losing my sight...and he said...quite a good chance...

At that moment...i just...stoned...smile at him and say good-bye...

Because i didn't know how to react or what to do...suddenly...when everything in my life seems to be better this semester though my results in school still not that good...but at least i am getting stronger...both emotionally and mentally...this have to happen...does it mean that i am not allowed to be happy?

Then i decide to drag it till next thursday to see the eye specialist...not that i dun wan to cure my eyes but there are far too many works and things i have to settle before i know the results of my eyes...whether its good or bad...

Only told 4 person about this...mama...and 3 friends...all of them have different reactions...

Mama was worried...my friend N tried to comfort me and teach me my schoolwork and at the same time give random cold jokes...curry comforted me also and accompany me last nite to mug a bit (while i eat burger lols hungry >.<)...and another friend also kinda tried to persuade me to see doc asap...but then suddenly add in "i dun respect people who dun love themselves"...well...in the first place i do love myself...but do i have a choice to choose what is piling on top of me? Okie i go to see the eye specialist without bothering what will happen to my work later...after knowing the results...what does it mean? It will only slow down my pace in my work...and affect what i have already planned....yes i know its my eyes...but if really i have another chance...i would have done checkup long before anything happens...loving oneself is not just doing things without caring what is going to come in the future...loving oneself is to do things which one is comfortable and happy with...even the choices made could be wrong...but afterall...its our choice isn't it?

Well...

Suddenly feel so lost...as to what i should do next...

But sometime when u start to lose...then u look out to things around you more carefully...

People...places...friends...

But oh well...

no matter what happen still have to see what is the results on thursday when i see the eye specialist...just hope that everything goes well...

EYES i need you~
Xin ♡




♥☆ Saturday, February 5, 2011 ; 1:24 PM ☆♥
❥{A fresh new post for CNY!

A fresh new...wonderful blog post for the year of rabbit~

HAPPY RABBIT YEAR EVERYONE!!!!

*Bounce Bounce*

Gonna miss the non-stop eating and sleeping when the real busy sem starts >.<

Going to grow into a "MRT" size soon...gosh~

Anywayz going to think up some new resolution and target to set for myself...or at least some stuff i wanna do or wanna get by end of my year 3 XD

Hmmm...

Hmmmmmmm...

Lols...*stoned*...(to be continued on my next post hopefully)

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Oh well...today is the third day of CNY...and here i am...stuck here working cos nobody can help cover for me...boooooooo~...feel like continuing to sleep and eat...(secretly munching 3 ferrero rocher just now...opps XD)

Well...got a lot to type...but dunnoe where to start...since it has been a real long time i have updated anything that is really really long...hmmm...

Hmmmm...

HMMM.....*stoned...again* =.=""


I shall update my blogpost soon enough with all my resolutions and some of my thoughts for last year...yup...very very soon >.<


Xin ♡