♫ Xin ❤
~Xin Xin World~
  


♥☆ Wednesday, October 14, 2009 ; 3:52 PM ☆♥
❥{while working...doing a lot of thinking...

Now working...

After being badly traumatised...shocked...and fallen down into the big deep black hole...i feel that nothing really seems bright to me anymore...everything seems dark...everything seems...haiz...

I tot...at least...very least...that i can score well for something i have learn before...my specialization...food...but in the end...in the end...i still cannot score well...i still...cannot...i guess...that...my last hope is gone...

Really wonder...should i even continue...why am i here...why...

Its really very lonely...not having anyone who can understand and let me a helping hand...just need some "rice grain" size of help...sometime really feel like drowning...but...i really have no idea what to do...

My only last hope...dumb me just didn't understand and read my notes carefully enough...i am...so dumb...T_T

I wonder...what i should do...maybe just like what my mum said on the phone just now...maybe i am too tired of studying science all the time bah...eventhough its my specialisation...but it dun seems very "food"...its more like biology and chemistry...but maybe its true bah...that i am too exhausted...that i am too tired of studying the same thing...that i need to change into different thing...

My mum said something which really makes me think again...what i should do in the future...she mention that the reason i wanted to go into poly is to try out something new...to explore into the new area....and because poly study super wide variety of things...i can always learn something new every year and every sem...thats why i can always be alert and enthu...

But now...i am studying in a more specialised area...an area which i am not good in...an area quite alien to me...and especially i dunnoe who to seek help from...and that i dunneo what to study and how to study...thats why...day by day...i got so sick and tired...of studying...

Maybe...but i never regretted coming into my current course...this is my dream...and i have finally fulfill it...maybe its time for me to move on to a new area bah...but i really enjoy being able to at least study in my current course...to really experience a lot of things...

Haiz...but still...its sad...not being able to understand anything at all...

Its still...very emo...and very...depressing...not to be able to know what to write during the exam instead of leaving blanks all over the place...its really...very....sad....and emo...

Haiz...

I can only let my tears drip bah...

Each time i am sad...i can only silently let my tears drip in my heart alone bah...i guess...haiz...

Emoooo...T_T
Xin ♡