♫ Xin ❤
~Xin Xin World~
  


♥☆ Tuesday, November 3, 2009 ; 1:10 PM ☆♥
❥{disappointment...

Now waiting for A.W to finish his Q & A with his polymer lecturer...haiz...i wanna go back hall~...but promised him to eat lunch with him le...so have to wait for him...feeling sleepy~...so sit down a while to blog in comp lab >.<

Yesterday was kinda emo...so fell asleep at around 12 am until like 1.30 am...woke up and was stunned cos supposedly only going to take a nap for like half an hr but ended up sleeping for 1.5 hrs...tsk tsk...lols =X

Yesterday my backache was also still aching...oh man...if my mum were to know that i even bath under cold water with my backache...(cos woke up too late...water heater off le...)...she is so gonna scold me...haiz...=X

Haiz...

Last night my mum called me...cos she was asking if everything was okie..and yar something like that...then maybe sound a bit emo and unhappy because of what happen last night...and suddenly she told me a story of when she was a little kid:

She used to fight a lot when she was a kid with her siblings...with her 2 sisters...sometime going into the extend of like cat fight (wow...thats...lols...)...quarreling with even the tiny things that when she recalled now sounds funny...like food...clothes...or even just not happy if one of the sister is always not around...

She was telling me that...because of my personality...as in...when i was small...i could have been the only child...but because my mum feels that i am always so lonely...so after considering for 3 years...she decided to have my sister...(but somehow...lols...my sister is so quiet and inactive...so end up a bit...yar nothing much...lols)

But anywayz...i guess she is trying to tell me that even for siblings that will be disagreement and lack of understanding...whats more if it is between friends...close friends...for me...a brother...which my mum say from little i have always wanted an elder brother or sister...but its like a never thing...

But now it feels as though i really have a brother...whom i can look for...its like wow...a dream suddenly fulfilled...but sadly...it is always being returned with disappointment...i guess...maybe cos i have always yearn for a elder brother...thats why even if it is small actions it really makes me very happy...as though there is really a brother behind me who will look after me...i guess...maybe i am thinking too much...

But still...it feels..really...haiz...dunnoe how to describe the feeling...a mixture of...loneliness and disappointment? Or maybe depression and emoo...

Small happiness comes with great disappointment...

Does all happiness always comes with disappointment?

Hmm...A.W. is out le...i guess i go off with him to eat Mac le...

Yup...
Xin ♡