♫ Xin ❤
~Xin Xin World~
  


♥☆ Friday, January 29, 2010 ; 1:05 PM ☆♥
❥{find no point in life anymore

Today...i finally feel that...


No matter how hard and how much i try...


In the end the results are still the same...


I guess there is no point in life anymore...


Totally no point in life...


I know there is no point in running away...


How i wish i can just sleep forever and never wake up...


Now at the usual spot when i am alone...like last time when i first enter uni...


The first spot where...a lot about myself...who i am...and other things...start to change and become clearer...


Now back at this spot...


All i can feel is the past loneliness flowing back...


Today in the lab...i tried my best to smile but in the end i still didn't manage to even just put a smile...


Making the rest of my lab members not as enthu as before..


Really i feel that if there is one less dumb me in this world...maybe it will be a even fun and nicer place...if the lab doesn't have my existence...then my lab members will be able to be more enthu...and someone will not be so exhausted because of my lab report...


Thanks for ur help again today...


Somehow as i sit here...a lot of thoughts just run through my mind...actually at the lab already many thoughts are running in my mind already...really really many thoughts...


Erhem tried to console me...thanks...i know u are trying to pull me from my emo state...but i guess...this is not just emo state...its really how much things i have caused...not only to myself...but to others...if i can just carry everything onto myself...and just fade off...maybe everything will be even happier...


Slowly fading off...i shall try to pull myself away from everyone...this should be the way i should have done...


Just fade off day by day...and become the old me again...no point holding to my current self...no point anymore...


Today is my second hw102a tut...and it shall be my last time i hear my fun laughter...


I am alone...and shall be this way...
Xin ♡