♫ Xin ❤
~Xin Xin World~
  


♥☆ Thursday, January 20, 2011 ; 11:57 AM ☆♥
❥{stoned...

Saw my results on 18th Jan midnight...from then have been in a "floating" stage...

Now working...

Have been working for the past few days...

Going back to hall every monday or tuesday and returning home only on sat night for the whole vacation this month...and have been hibernating and sleeping...

After knowing my results...

All of a sudden the hibernation mode just stopped...

Just feel like stoning...

Its like...i am depressed...i am sad...but i no longer know what expression i should be making...

Its like all of the sudden...i feel numbed...and its like totally given up...can no longer know what i should be expressing...

Because didn't really expect to get not very good grade for my elective. Spent quite a huge effort hoping that at least i can score well for my elective. But in the end its like working really hard but my effort is not paying off at all. Its like really depress...but at the same time numb and dunnoe what to do or what expression i should be making...a crying face? a frustrated face or...? In the usual scenario i would be jumping up and down in frustration or felt really sad and would cry a bit...but suddenly i just stoned...

It has been like this case for days after 18th jan...i can be laughing and smiling...but in my mind and heart...i am actually just floating and stoning...trying to hide myself with my smile...but am i really smiling and happy?

I can be out with my friends...but i am actually just...out...not feeling any mood at all...what is happening to me...

Is this a sign that i have totally given up....no longer have any slight motivation?
Xin ♡